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Month: May, 2009

Grandparents

After reading Nancy’s post on her relationship with her FIL, various thoughts sprung to my mind. So i decided to pen them down.

I have been meeting with my Maternal Grandparents almost every single day since Class 5. Living in the same city as them, my parents would drop us there and we would get dropped there after school. My Nani is particularly an extremely fit lady *touchwood*. She gets up at 5, goes for her walk, irrespective of the weather and then does her yoga sessions, before entering the kitchen. She has to be one of the most adorable ladies. In fact, when I started looking for some Western Dance Classes to join, she pestered me that she would also join with me. By the way she is 75 or perhaps more 🙂 She is also the coolest Nani in the world. She allowed my mother to marry a non-Hindu person, around 2 decades back, and supported her thoroughly, even when my father’s family was not too keen. My friends adore her and so do all her grand children. Recently she is planning to go on a trip to Rishikesh to rejuvinate herself, along with her sisters.
My Nana on the other hand has got to be the most pessimist person! He thinks EVERY SINGLE thing he eats, WILL have side-effects on him!! He has been ill quite a number of times, but its my Nani’s determination that gets him up on his feet again 🙂 I remember last year, my Nana fell down. he ws in a lot of pain. He couldn”t move and since he had some stomach problem as well, he couldn’t eat or drink as well. That night, I was up till 3 studying. I heard Nana coughing and i woke up Nani, the whole night we were up. Just the two of us (since my parents had gone for Hajj). At one point of time, we thought he would not live to see the day. So the only resort left to us was to pray. Nani holding his one hand and me holding his other. We both started chanting our prayers. Nani chanting her mantras and me chanting my Quranic verses. And the night passed. Today he goes for his walks, does a bit of household shopping and listens to his songs almost the whole day. I don’t think I will ever forget that night.

By the way did I mention, my Nani drives around the city in her car, while my Nana still cannot drive 😉

My Nana’s mother was also alive till my first year of college. She was so fond of us. She was always calling us to her room, to have a chat, but we would often rush out after few minutes for some work. She died in front of my eyes. I wish I had spent more time with her.

Coming to my Paternal Grandparents. I don’t remember my Dadi. We were told, she was a really adorable lady, who would scold my mother and father if she ever saw her favourite grand daughters getting scolded. Sigh…

My Dada on the other hand lived to the age of 98 and died in a lot of pain in December last year. I wasn’t particularly close to him. He was a traditional old man, who was extremely religious. He was old fashioned too, he did not like grown up girls in his house to wear anything but the Indian Dresses and never allowed TV in his house. It was only in the last 2 years of his life, he allowed the TV on the repeated requests of his grandson, who wanted to watch Cricket on it. But till he died he never really saw TV. However, the one thing I admired about him was that, no matter how old fashioned he was, he never forbade any of his Daughters in Law to go out and work, nor did he tell any of us to wear Hijab. In fact he was so proud of the fact that i was studying to be a lawyer. Alas, he never saw me become one 😦

I wanted to remove my apprehensions and spend some time with him. But it never really happened. He passed away too soon. Or perhaps I realised too late.

I wrote this poem in Class 5. I understand its meaning more truly now.

Grandparents guide us

They are the one’s who are behind us

We are like a fen,

they guide us to become wise men.

This is all I remember !!

Something to think about

हर खुशी है लोगों के दमन में, पर एक हँसी के लिए वक्त नही।
दिन रात दौड़ती दुनिया में, जिंदगी के लिए ही वक्त नही।
माँ की लोरी का एहसास तो है, पर माँ को माँ कहने का वक्त नही।
सारे रिश्तों को तो हम मार चुके, अब उन्हें दफ़नाने का भी वक्त नही।
सारे नाम मोबाइल में हैं, पर दोस्ती के लए वक्त नही।
गैरों की क्या बात करें, जब अपनों के लिए ही वक्त नही।
आंखों में है नींद बड़ी, पर सोने का वक्त नही।
दिल है ग़मौं से भरा हुआ, पर रोने का भी वक्त नही।
पैसों की दौड़ में ऐसे दौडे, की थकने का भी वक्त नही।
पराये एहसासों की क्या कद्र करें, जब अपने सपनो के लिए ही वक्त नही।
तू ही बता ऐ जिंदगी, इस जिंदगी का क्या होगा, की हर पल मरने वालों को, जीने के लिए भी वक्त नही…..

Something I stumbled upon on the net!

Life’s lessons


I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.
I’ve learned that no matter how much people claim they will be there for you, in the end its just u against the world
I’ve learned you cant make people change the way they think about, all you can do is change the path so that u dont meet them
I’ve learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.
I’ve learned that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry,but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.
I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jackasses.
I’ve learned that The best part of any relationship is the beginning.
I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I’ve learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t compare yourself to others – they are more screwed up than you think.
I’ve learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
I’ve learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I’ve learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know you.
I’ve learned that no matter how many friends you have, if you are their pillar you will feel lonely and lost at the times you need them most.
I’ve learned that When you are in a position to not be a nice person, that’s when you find out who you really are.

I’ve learned that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I’v earned that My views have evolved from childhood, but I haven’t changed my mind in a very dramatic way. I’ve always felt I was on the side of the angels.

I’ve learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I’ve learned that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I’ve learned that sometimes when my friends fight, I’m forced to choose sides even when I don’t want to.
I’ve learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you’re finished.
I’ve learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things.
I’ve learned that I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.
I’ve learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
I’ve learned that writing, as well as talking, can ease emotional pains.
I’ve learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
I’ve learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.
I’ve learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. And the real pains in the ass are permanent.
I’ve learned not to care, because caring makes you hurt.
I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.
I’ve learned that although the word “love” can have many different meanings, it loses value when overly used.
I’ve learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I’ve learned that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings and standing up for what you believe.

I’ve learned that sumtimes ignorance is d best way to handle a situation

And I’ve learned…..

Testing

Testing 1..2…3………..

Just shifted here. Uncomfortable with the unfimliar surroundings. Will take time to get used to it!

Patriotism and me

There were times when I often wished I was born in the pre-independence era, so I could also do my bit for India. While in my school, I was extremely keen on joining Army, and actually get a chance to go fight in a war. Sadly that did not happen, as my mother was strictly against it. The reason she gave was that since her own brother i.e. my Mama was in the Army, it was enough for the whole family, and for many generations to come. (I too gave up the idea on getting to know I will have to study science for that!! )
Anyways, since a young age, I wanted to so something fruitful in life. And i started pretty early too 🙂 I remember being in class 5 and me and the twin decided to open a small school for the kids. We roped in two of the juniors at school and persuaded them to get a small blackboard, while we arranged for copies/pencils etc. Then began the arduous task of persuading the parents and the kids to join us. I remember we went to various chai-wallas, press-waalis, kaam waali bai, to convince them to send their kids to us so they could learn basic English and Maths.
When finally we had around 7-10 kids in our ‘school’ we started teaching them albeit in a haphazard manner. We were kids teaching other kids. Well, it did not turn out to be a successful ‘venture’, as most of the kids stopped coming after 10 days, even after we tried to lure them by chocolates. 😦
Well, atleast i tried 😀
Lately, I have been intending to open a school, for the poor kids. I know it will be a difficult task considering the fact that I will soon start working, nevertheless, it’ll be a dream which has to come true. This would be my way of showing patriotism.

We often tend to get so self-absorbed that we forget to look around us. We forget that as responsible and educated citizens we should give back to the society in one way or the other. Small small things make hell of a difference. Things like not wasting water, or switching of electricity when not in use matter a lot. Most of us do realise this but many don’t care much. If each one of us takes responsibility to do one thing for the society in week, be it planting a tree, or teaching the maid’s kid some basic mathematical calculation, or trying to conserve the electricity, the world would be a much better place.

Twitter

I am now on twitter on http://twitter.com/saima1986

And desperately trying to figure out so many things on it…

Add me on who ever’s on it 🙂

Life in the past few months

I have have been having the most exhausting days of my life since March end. Exhausting, both physically and emotionally. After almost living in the hospital for around 10 days in March-April and then now again in May, has finally taken its toll on me. Going to the doctors, seeing my loved ones (my twin and my mother) in so much pain, is extremely painful. Thankfully, both of them are on their road to recovery, (*touchwood*), still there are times when i wonder why us, and that too so suddenly.
Having taken the round of hospitals and practically living there, i was invariably surrounded by some family, whos family member was suffering from some ghastly disease/problem. One such neighbour was a family where the father had just died, though not young but certainly not a die-able age. The mother was inconsolable and seeing her crying hysterically right next to me, moved me to tears. And surprisingly there were random people, who were just standing there and seeing the poor lady crying as if there was some show going on. Later on I found out that the mother became so ill that she too had to be admitted in Emergency. Imagine the plight of the kids.
At the second trip to another hospital for my sister, the room was shared by one more female, whose operation had gone haywire due to which she had to undergo the painful operation again. Its been three days since my sister’s discharge and the poor lady is still in the hospital. The whole nights she would spend crying in pain and cursing the doctors. No amount of consolation was acceptable by her either from the doctors or by her husband.

Death is inevitable, yet the process towards it should not be so painful. I saw so many aged people, struggling to breathe, struggling to live. It was so painful to see those frail bodies being struck with needles everywhere. How frail life is.

These few months I also realised the genuineness of my so-called friends. Almost all of them did not bother asking for my mother’s/sister’s health at any point. It was always their after thought. Never once did they bother to visit. Those who bothered are friends for life. Glad i realised this soon.
😦 Ending the note in not so cheerful note, will be back again when I am able to do write ‘cheerfully’ again.

Apologies to A and Nancy for not responding to their tags, hope you understand.
I guess I deserve an award for being the laziest blogger alive!! 🙂